GREAT BUY             √



Thanksgiving and Christmastime are excellent shopping times for us in Tampa Bay, the three major Grocery chains all pull out their stops on the turkeys and sell off the herd of turkeys at very almost extreme giveaways. 

These turkeys were fast raised for the season, they are in abundance and a 22 dollar turkey can be had for 7 dollars.  My partner “El Cheapo KaBong” and I run down and buy half a dozen, each sometimes having to exceed  the daily limit and into the garage freezer.  

They will hold for more than a year.  They are as good as the day you put them in and about every two months out comes one of the frozen turkeys.  Defrosted over night and next morning I go into Samurai Warrior Mode. 

How did we get the name Johnny Five Turkey...  Short Circuit is a 1986 comedy science fiction film about a robot, #5, who short circuits during a thunderstorm and escapes from Nova Robotics. 

He has been designed as a weapon, and his designer Newton Crosby and the others at Nova are concerned he might be dangerous. Meanwhile, #5 is being protected by Stephanie Speck and all works out in the end.   Something wonderful has happened...No. 5 is alive I call it Johnny Five Turkey, “No Disassemble” just reconstruction.


•   I throw the junk package away,  I have enough packaged good broths and stocks to make anything.  And I live in a Condo so I don’t need a stock pot going when I’m not home and stinking up my neighbors sensory glands looking for a free meal.

•  And its simple, if the grandkids saw the guts, we would be back to Mac and Cheese.  The gurgles and gimlets go to the garbage triple wrapped to discourage the coyotes, alligators and others ( raccoons can open anything) that think,  they own the golf course I live on.

•   Our tribe,  I have found with kids never eating the legs, wings or thighs because most cooking techniques dry them out, so they were removed.  They all want the white meat and gravy.  Not worth the effort...  If you choose to go traditional forget Norman Rockwell and learn to Spatchcock.  It will improve the legs and wings but again Kids on the legs will, usually one bite and dump the leg.

•   On turkeys, it is just not worth the effort, the parts are placed in a pot of broth or stock and cooked till the meat can be removed with a knife.  Pitch the bones, the meat is going into a stewpot, pot pie or slow cooker. 

•   The breasts were removed and placed on a tray separated by foil as I prepped the two like pork loins making them Regular ( usual ingredients salt, pepper, paprika  rosemary, thyme, sage etc)  and Spicy ( Usual plus Cajun, or Sriracha and same thing as paying five times as much for trimmed breasts alone.   

•   All the small spare meat around the breast and bones were surgically removed and placed in the slow cooker or stew pot cooked into the soup.  We took all the meat off the wings, legs and thighs and throw them into the stew pot till the meat falls off, dump any remaining bones.

•  I took a third of that meat that was pulled and cooked into barbecue sauce. ( Like pulled chicken only turkey) That the kids will eat.

•  To the remaining chicken or turkey broth soup  I added two packages of frozen Sam’s veggies, mandolin thin sliced potatoes and tomato paste, diced and sauce, the usual spices. a thickener like flour or arrowroot,  and Herbs de Provence and some other goodies and we netted four quarts of thick soup, it’s a wholesome soup, some barbeque and two big turkey breasts which is all they eat anyway.  VPC (Very Picky Crew)

•   Last point: This methodology is not for tradition, its for 100% usage of the turkey and creation of four or more dishes from one seven dollar source.